This song was well associated with Cliff’s repertoire but in recent years it has been adopted by Tim. It explains an age-old question few are willing to openly inquire of, and accomplishes it in such pleasing melodious tones! I understand that the verse had been in a flurry of speed by the poet Henry Lawson (c. 1910) as a means on the spot to trade for a few more drinks at the bar, and set to the 1866 hymn melody by Samuel John Stone “The Church’s One Foundation”… FYI, this hymn also inspired Rudyard Kipling for his 1896 poem “Hymn Before Action”. At any rate, the lyrics set below are a version, the song being altered by the singer presenting and it has been difficult to ascertain what lyrics were exactly the first.
Jos. Morneault
The dogs were having a party
They came from near and far
Some flew in by aeroplane
And some drove in by car
They went into the lobby
And signed the visitors´ book
And each one hung his arsehole
Upon a separate hook
One dog was not invited
And this aroused his ire
He burst into the meeting place
And loudly shouted, ´Fire!´
Now the dogs were so excited
They had no time to look
And each one took an arsehole
From off the nearest hook
It is a sad sad story
For it is very sore
To wear another´s arsehole
You´ve never worn before
And that is why when dogs meet
By land or sea or foam
Each sniffs the other´s arsehole
In hope it is its own
I first heard this in about 1976 at a Fairport Convention concert when some equipment failed. Simon Nicol stepped up and sang this whilst onstage repairs were carried out!
My dad used to recite this at parties after a few whiskies in he early 1950’s although he said bottoms for us children.
When we got older he had us in stitches with his war stories about his WW2 service in the Royal Navy.
My stepfather knew this and told it often. I thought it so funny.
My Grandfather was an old-time cowboy and sang it for us grandchildren. He actually knew the brother of Calamity Jane who would hold my mother on his lap while my grandmother cooked.